THE 456th FIGHTER INTERCEPTOR SQUADRON
T PROTECTORS OF S. A. C.
A Sad Announcement
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The Death Of Common Sense
Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, Common Sense. Common Sense
lived a long life, but died in the United States from heart failure
early in the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was, since
his birth records were lost long ago in bureaucratic red tape. He
selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes, and
factories, helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness.
For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous lawsuits held no
power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued
lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird
gets the worm, and that life isn't always fair.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in
charge, not the kids), and it's okay to come in second.
A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression, and the
Technological Revolution, Common Sense survived cultural and educational
trends including body piercing, whole language, and "new math." But his
health declined when he became infected with the
In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages
of well intentioned but overbearing regulations. He watched in pain as
good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers. His health rapidly
deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented zero tolerance
Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for
kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig of mouthwash
after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only
worsened his condition.
It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to
administer aspirin to a student but could not inform the parent when a
female student was pregnant or wanted an abortion.
Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband, churches became businesses, criminals received better
treatment than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in
everything from the Boy Scouts to professional sports.
When an individual, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
was hot, was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was
kept informed of developments regarding questionable regulations such as
those for low flow toilets, rocking chairs, stepladders and auto
Common Sense finally succumbed when, while the United States was
fighting a war on terrorism, a federal judge declared the Pledge of
Allegiance to be unconstitutional.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by two step siblings: My Rights, and Ima Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
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